Newspaper Pot Flag

what would happen if I sent a special gift to Gordon Ramsey?

I want to send a big poo to Gordon Ramsey,a big brown one.What would happen if I sent one to him with some little flags stuck in it with drawings of his face on them? I would season the poo with origano and black pepper obviously. I would include a poem about Gordon explaining that he is a bottom sniffer and a chef’s whites brownerer. the poem would also include the line “you aint nothing but pot wash mate and your cake’s a state I hate what you bake and put on my plate”.
What would Mr Ramseys reaction be,and could I get into trouble? I would use cut-out letters from a tabloid newspaper so that my handwriting could not be traced. I would also send him a signed photo of Robbie Coltraine but with some wee on it.
a brownerer is he/she who makes something brown with poopsie-woopsies
thanks norman,nice work to the brownerer protest people

He’d probably bake it into a brownie, put it into a nice box, tie a bow around it and send it to Gary Rhodes with a note saying “Merry Christmas”.

CNN: Obama Assisting Al-Qaeda / CIA Rebel Commander In Libya